New year is on Ze way! i'mma ride it Bottomless! WEE!!

 

New developments for this Ox, although I got slapped around a bit, but it definitely was for a good reason,

You gotta starve for a year or so (I know it's medically impossible, unless if your this guy) to save up for that 64" LCD screen.

so in other words, I believe you gotta suffer a bit for a bigger and better picture. I really hope things workout this year. I have a good feeling it will.

Starting Thursday!

Wish me luck!

On a separate note, I  Mahmood (usually known as Sexy Mamo), Thank you from the upside down heart of mine for the overwhelming wall posts and calls. Some called out of nowhere, whom I haven’t spoken to since the year of the 7up.

Again Thank you all! I love you guyz! Happy New Year! and Happy Chinese New year!(in Advance).

I wish you all the best for the year 2009. Please do not repeat 2008's mistakes! 

And If your Chinese, be sure to send me some Ang Pows (make sure it’s in a white envelope, people are color blind here, they don’t see red..)

*stands up straight*

*left hand on tops his heart*

*Salutes*

*Music plays*

*Flag goes up behind him*

*prepares to sing national anthem*

*Deep breath, Looks at flag patriotically, and sees pair white pajama pants*

*Looks down realizing not wearing any pants*

Memories of an Ox who lived in 2008, and Mingabala-in the Year 2009

 

Ahlan Wa Sahlan! Salamat Datang! Welcome! Tash reef Laa iye! huan ying! Mingalaba!

2008 had many ups and downs, well mostly melancholies and pure disasters. And I really hope 2009 will be a good year.

My Chinese friends warned me, and told me that people who were born in the year of Ox will wish they wanna die in 2008. They were so very much wrong! I just wanted to survive! Dodging all those flying arrows…yeah it was hard. I did get hit few times..hey me still breathing, well barely..enough to type this post..

Okay it was a bittersweet year, more of bitterguord (is that how u spell it?) eh?

Some highlights of the year;

Broke up with my high school sweet heart, who definitely left a good mark in my life, there are so much things to say ( again goods things obviously), but I don’t think I can write everything in one night. Screw one night! Give me a life time! I still probably won’t able to finish, well I made my share of blunder-ness

Went clubbing after many years, didn’t enjoy it, and did something I don’t think any soul would be proud of. Everytime I think about it... It breaks my heart, and I wish I could go back in time and break past mamo’s fucking teeth.

Hmumum.. *munching on strawberries*

Made some new friends and wish I made more, and I really miss all my friends. I miss Sabby, Yasir (I just talked him), Jumn, Janice, Kimmy, Veron, Shaun, Christine, the other Christine, Fong, Tseng Yang, Calvin, Xin yi, the other Xin yi, Alvin, Yee Leng, Calvin, Jeff, Arfian, Jazzy, Nette, Sheila, Tristan, Christina, Jackie, Winnie (all 4), yew Joe and few more retards at the gym n school. Forgive give me if I didn’t mention your names.

Last Feb, Yasir and I Joined a gym…and certainly some chix turned their heads, not necessarily toward us

My last Sem was probably the most awesome and most depressing sem (cuz it was the last sem).

Again, I made my share of unintelligent mistakes, and I really wish I hadn’t made some, it’s proving to be quite difficult trying to climb out of the well I dug... beginning of the year 2008. And I wish I had some help…rope someone?

Went to a dentist

Sisters’ got married, and I couldn’t attend the wedding cuz of my midterms. Everyone says it was huge n nice. Oh well ce la veee.

Recently noticed people can change quite fast,

had an awesome farewell dinner with some of my closest friends, I wish the rest came too :(

My last day in Malaysia was probably one of most painful days of my life

I’ve been slapped with racism/discrimination

And now me at home, turning 23 while I’m typing this *looks at the clock*

So what’s for next year?

Hmm…

I don’t wanna promise myself anything, but these are the key points of the year 2009.

Money!

Business!

More Money!

Attack three countries

Dominate or at least penetrate an industry

Teach stuff to people who are responsible for things (hard to explain)

Gain control of stuff that I’m suppose to take control, before it’s too late

Take appropriate responsibilities and achieve more than families' and self expectations.

I guess that it for now, good bye 2008!

And hello 2009!

SO GET READY!

Lights!

Director: WHERE THE HELL ARE MY ACTORS??

Dude with funny hat: your not wearing ur glasses

Director: oh right! WHERE THE HELL ARE MY GLASSES!!

Dude with the funny hat: it’s in your mouth sir

Director: oh yeah! WHO PUT IT THERE?

Dude with the funny had: *ignores and screams*

ACTION!!!

LET THE SHOW BEGIN!

Soldiers Within Us

 

When the sun rises

I’m your enemy

Stranger to you

A rebel for survival

Wants no gold

Fight for bread mold

Fight for us

Oh fight for us!

Few fell and asked to be forgotten

Rotten in the field of roses

They see themselves

Some pleased and some discontent

Repent is what all they want

A year, a month, a day, an hour to a minute.

But it’s too late

Screams to the living

Blinds and deaf

It’s just a matter of time

Before you know your time

YOU BETTER START RUNNING!

Every morning in Africa, a gazelle wakes up.
It knows it must run faster than the fastest lion or it will be killed.
Every morning a lion wakes up.
It knows it must outrun the slowest gazelle or it will starve to death.
It doesn’t matter whether you are a lion or a gazelle.
When the sun comes up, you better start running.

African Proverb, stole it from the book The world is flat

I strongly doubt the world is flat hmmm...

Anyway, this is one of my favorite proverbs

BEERED!!

Hello! Hope you’re in good health..

Story of the day, I haven’t shaved my beard since last Thursday, not that I had any plans to grow them, just merely out of major slothfulness. As you could hopefully imagine, I was a day away from looking like Abdelkarim Hussein Mohamed Al-Nasser, the third most wanted man in FBI’s list. ( look here --> http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/terrorists/fugitives.htm).

I could imagine walking down the JFK airport with the beard of mine and I kneel down to tie my shoe laces, security guard sees me, and calls his partner Heblew on the wireless, (who the security dude been cheating on his wife with...) security guard and heblew gets together fast. I see them… Security dude points at me, and smiles. I thought their checking out my ass or some shit; I shake my head hoping they’d understand I don’t want any of their homosexual entertainments.

I see them walking towards me, I get up fast and sprint towards the boarding, hoping to lose them. THEY STARTED RUNNING FOR GOD SAKE! I’M LIKE SHIT! I’M GONNA BE RAPED (literally) BY THESE HOMOCOPS! I START RUNNING TOO! White woman screams TERRORIST!! I’m like FUCK! WHERE? GREAT! This just isn’t my day! NOT ONLY GAY COPS! FUCKING TERRORISTS HAD TO PICK TODAY OF ALL DAYS!! Where do I go now? Run like a headless chicken? Save my life or dignity? Who cares! RUN!

SHIT! I see an avalanche of cops running towards me! Homo ones are nowhere to be found, probably somewhere in the enthusiastic army OF DEATH!

Suddenly, something whacks me from the back, I turn around and there is nothing, I look down I see a little old lady. Me Still little dazed and confused with all the commotion and recovering from the old bitch lady slap, I’m like hello miss, how can I be able to be helping you? She responds fast and aggressively, LEAVE OUR AIRPORTS ALONE! I had the EH? Face… Excuse...ahh I thought my self, before I could say anything else, I see 9mms and Taser guns pointed at me, so many weapons, felt like each cop had 2 guns on em! GET DOWN ON YOUR KNEES AND PUT YOUR HANDS ABOVE YOUR HEAD! AHMED! I heard one of them yell out, yes sir! I replied! Fast! Someone else yelled out! HIS GOING FOR HIS SHOE BOMB! Brzzzzth gzgzzzgzzzz…*being tasered* gzzhzzzz gzzzssgzz *laughs* gzzgzzz

The end

Cool! I just noticed something, If you look at the top three most wanted men on FBI’s web piece of paper, I think their ranked according how long their beards are… look really close, OSAMA has the longest ( safe to assume, can be categorized them as tall) beard! I’m telling ya! It’s some retarded conspiracy shit!

Back to the story of my own and only sexy beard, so today (or was it yesterday? Maybe the day before.. ahh never mind). So my second cousin’s wife wanted me to visit her, I’m not particularly fond of them, and the last time I saw them was around 8 years ago, not that I hate them or anything, I just don’t like them, why you ask? We all have our reasons *smiles*

So I needed to shave, since I didn’t want to go as a Sasquatch. I started looking for barber’s place,. So I find a decent looking barber shop; I go in, I see the barber cutting some other dudes hair, I wait for him to finish, approximately 10 minutes barber dude was done butchering the Arab dude’s hair. I initially spoke in Arabic, and told him I needed a shave, and then I heard him speak Bengali, and I switched to Bengali and carried light conversations later.

So I put my laptop aside, sat down, laid my head on headrest. He grabs a clean looking cloth and wraps it around my neck.

So he takes out a fresh batch shaving blades, takes one out, and sanitizes it..

He puts a wet warm towel over my face, and rubs lightly, grabs the Nivea cream, and takes some out and puts it all over my face. I thought to myself shouldn’t he putting shaving cream around my face? Oh well let’s see where this goes..

So after Nivea which I found found it a bit strange, I decided to ignore him and try to watch some Bengali TV. While my eyes trying to reach the box with pictures and sounds, he takes something and rubs it around my face again, it certainly didn’t look like a shaving cream, the cream was transparent, and smelled familiar. He grabs another huge lump of it and rubs it again around my beard. I look at the container he’s getting all cream from, I was like HOLLY fatty boom boom tamiaahh!! I know what that is! It’s a fucking hair gel!

Okay I said to myself, do I ask this dude, why the hell is he shaving my face off with hair gel? Or should I just ignore and wait for my throat to get slit by this maniac? Or join in the insanity and see where this goes…OH well I decided to join and not say anything and see where all this can lead to. So he shaves and shaves. Then 3^rd lump of hair gel around my face and shaves again.

He washed my face again with another warm towel, and asked me whether I want a facial, I was like EH? Facial? His like since your Bengali, I’ll give you a free facial, I normally charge 30 bux, I’m like hmmm…I said okayyy *reluctantly of course* I was expecting Vaseline all over my face this time, but no, it was actually quite pleasant, I had the steamy thing blowing steam towards my face and stuff, buncha creams and yeah. 30 min later it was done (may have been shorter).

Finally, after everything I asked him how much? He said 10! Can u believe it! He said 10! I always paid 5! Stupid dumass! Charging me 10 for pasting hair gel! What? He said it’s a free facial! Hehe yeah yeah I paid him 10 bux

Aight me off!! Sorry for the long post

Bari Qu-tai?

Bengali dude: Bari Qutai?

Burmese chick: Bari Qudai na, misfalateh

Bengali: *speechless*

This is an actual event that took place..ahm it's not funny if I explain it in English, too bad for u if you don't speak Bengali or Burmese

Dreaming of stuff I’m not suppose to,

 

I fell asleep last night by thinking of stuff that I’m not suppose to, I couldn’t help it. I felt so bad, I wish I can talk and explain to someone. But I’m in no position to explain or talk. The dreams I had last night, well you could categorize them as nightmares. I wish I didn’t have them, now it’s bothering me. Hoping to get better in few days. Need someone to talk to…

Ooo donut!

Still Home Sick

It’s been 3 weeks and 2 days since I got back, and I just unpacked my suit case, I did not wanna touch my luggage, cuz it will be excruciating and it was…

I remember packing that big black box (with gray stripes). As I was taking out some of my shirts and pants, most of them still had Snowy’s fur (my cat). Everything I took outta that bag had good memories, like the shirts and tees I bought with Sabby or Yasir, shirts and pants they bought me. I wish I can travel time and go back 3 years, would do it all over again! And repeat this year bit different.

Anyway, I miss home (Malaysia), I wish I owned that apartment. I miss my cat, I wonder what’s he up to?

Speechless

I wrote this post last week, but didn't have time to upload it :) 

Hello once again, its been 3 days since I started looking for a job, if you read some of my previous posts, you would know that Luck hasn’t been that nice to me.. I woke up at 6 am; I took a shower, wore my best shirt and pants, baptized my self on cologne. Than I realized I forgot to wear my lucky undies, so I took off my pants and wore my green boxers, and followed by pants.

Got my 20 copies of my resumes among other documents and my shaving cream (I forgot to take it out since I got back from land of Malaysia), and went to a mirror and said to me self you ready? Let’s go!

I wanted to apply at hotels first, specifically in marketing and sales department, and the first hotel I went to was Radisson, I was a little nervous considering this was my first ever time I actually went out looking for a job.

Took a cab to the hotel; reached hotel; after asking for direction towards HR office. I found the tiny office and entered.

Filipino dude smoking Dunhill lights, greets me and asked me to come in.

He understood that I was looking for a job, I hand him my 2 page resume, he reads and reads, and looked bit confused. And I thought to myself, shit! I made a mistake somewhere in there (and later I really wished I made a mistake in my resume). He says wow, you’re from Bangladesh? And you speak so many languages? I’ve never met a Bangladeshi person who speaks 5 languages *I gloated a bit* (I actually speak 6 lingo) and he also says wow, you also been to Malaysia? Asked me how is Malaysia, I said it’s a nice place (I lied… it’s an awesome place).

He “looked” happy with my resume, and asked me when can I start working? Obviously I said immediately and he hands me the employment form and I fill it up.

Few minutes later, a bald Saudi dude walks in, with huge stainless steel coffee mug, huge aviator glasses (yeah aviators!), on jeans and t-shirt. Filipino dude says wait, my boss will interview you. I nodded and I said look I don’t need to transfer my sponsorship (something all foreigners must deal and live with in Saudi).

Filipino dude passed my resume to the Saudi, and I waited for a response. The Saudi dude says something to the Filipino dude (which I kinda guessed later on), the Filipino dude comes back to me and says;

I’m sorry we can’t hire you; we have a new company policy that tells us not to hire Bangladeshis. I was speechless, I didn’t know whether to argue or storm out. Few minutes earlier the dude couldn’t wait to hire me, obviously the Saudi dude told him not to hire me.

I really hated my self for carrying a Bengali passport, and I wished I was a resident in Saudi with my other passports. Anyway, I said thank you for your time. The Filipino dude was nice enough to give me his email addresses and his phone number and asked me to contact or email him by coming Saturday.

I walked out and wondered, how many of these companies will reject me because of my passport.

So let’s go to the next hotel! Mercure! I approached the reception and asked him to direct me towards HR. and he pointed towards the parking lot. With a bit of hassle, I eventually found the underground parking lot and I walked in. I see a security booth inside. I asked him in Arabic for the direction again. He asked me why? I was like obviously applying for a job. He was like wait let me know the HR department (security has been tightened in hotels after Bombay blasts).

The security dude talks on the phone and informs them that there is a possible candidate. Then the security dude calls me and asks for my nationality? And obviously I had to say Bangladesh and he goes back to the phone, mumbles a bit and gets back to me. He says the HR guys are busy now, you can leave you resume with me.

Fucking hell, I don’t even get to enter your office because I carry a Bengali passport, man this degree of racism/discrimination is Fucking disgusting.

Then I went to my third and fourth hotel, the receptionists took my resumes and told me the HR department are still on holiday.

My fifth hotel of the day was Marriot, I asked the military forces for directions towards HR, they didn’t know and so went to the receptionist, and he told me it’s in the basement.

Reached HR office, I see a Filipino and an Indian dude. I filled up the employment form, about 45 minutes later the HR manger calls me in (again a Saudi). Asked me few questions, this guy looked bit okie, and he said he’ll call me within 2 weeks and will let me know.

Sixth hotel was Move’n pick, saw my resume and asked me to go back on Thursday.

Seventh hotel, habitat asked me to go back the next day, I met an ex-lecturer working there.

By now I was running outta hotels to go to.

Yasir came to pick me up from Marriot and we picked up Adnan, bitched about fucked up the day was. Made few more copies of my copies, Yasir got his beard back, And ate at Al-Baik, and smoked few sticks with em and went home.

So next day, I went back to habitat hotel, I saw another friend working there, I was bit confident that I’d get a job here, after a 30 min interview, he did tell me I can get a job at that place, but not in sales but as concierge and I wasn’t allowed to take tips! Hey at least they offered me a job.

I also went to Proctor and Gamble (P&G), So I walked in, got through the security check, reached the front office, asked him for HR. and the dude points at a Saudi dude, and says that’s the HR manager.

I approached the Saudi and asked in Arabic, are you’re the HR manager? He said yes, I’m like I’m like I’m looking for a job. Then he asks me where am I from? Because its hard for them to determine where I’m from with my Arabic accent (cuz I got the makkan accent), I replied in Arabic, min Bangladesh.

So he says, we don’t hire Bangladeshis in the office, only in factory plants. How do you respond to that?

FUCK YOU! YOUR LOSS!

Newayz, I’m still applying for jobs, I have my shops to keep me busy..so during the day I look for a jobs, and after 4pm I run our computer shop.

He shall be far away

I wrote few posts over the past week, but couldn’t post em up, cuz me still waiting for DSL in Jeddah. Arghhh. Actually I got a huge post coming up, hopefully by tomorrow. Right now I’m waiting for my ride to Jeddah. So yay! Can’t wait to go back.
oh i should also write about sister's wedding :)

EH? in the family

Me: where is mum?
Sister: where else, probably beating somebody.
Me: oh okay, now get me some coke woman!
Sister: *walks off*

Feeling FUCKING SICK!

WEE! me piggy back riding (is that what u call when u steal Wifi connections from random strangers?) I can't wait for Saturday, so I can be fuckin busy. I really hate being or feeling like this. I would like to explain what "this" is, but never mind loh :). he needs to be same old him again, would take a while but i know i can do it.

eh?

me: man!! stupid bullies r on the rise
Dumass: yeah man, what the fuck seriously?
me: yeah!!, the other day i saw buncha kids walking around with knife boots, on the pond or whatever you call it.
dumass: what? u mean? ice skates?
me: is that what they're callin em now?


P.S, this is a stolen material not my original bulb

My Luck Is Streaking

I’ve been here for little a week, and I lost track of the number of bad luck I had in this country, well actually my journey to the land of kicked in the crotch an get chased around for an ass rape by Unsexy luck initiated in Malaysia, from the day I was “suppose” to leave and come to this beautiful land of Saudi (Did I just call this land beautiful? Oh GOD! Whats happening to me? GOTTA LEAVE BEFORE I START CALLING THIS PLACE MY MOTHER LAND OR SOME SHIT), where was I? oh yes bad “lucks”, I’m gonna try to count the number of bad “lucks” I’ve had so far.

Bad Luck 1: I was in the land of Petaling Jaya, Bandar Sunway, Selangor Malaysia Boleh! Before Sabby left, I lost my precious sexy white with fine delicate orange stripe card reader which I bought less than 3 weeks ago.

Bad luck 2: After Sabby left, I couldn’t find a cab that will go towards Tristan’s place

Bad luck 3: At the bank, I wasn’t sure if the old lady behind the counter was hitting on me, because I couldn’t quite understand what she was saying.

Bad luck 4: I was waiting at Subang Square and I asked my friend to pick me up from Subang Parade (I know it’s not a bad luck, merely my own stupidity)

Bad luck 5: In the airport, (if you read and understood my previous blabbering posts) this where things really get close to getting raped in the ass by “Unsexy Lucks” the information lady tells me they cancelled/re-scheduled without any notification.

Bad luck 6: The PNR number on my ticket was wrong, after fifteen minutes of giving all the damned number on that damned sheet of paper. And later to find out that my flight was 3 days earlier. Oh I also learned to name a country with any letters.

Bad luck 7: The Mc’d session, where I realized that my visa to Saudi Expired and this where I realized Unsexy lucks was not only out to rape me, but it also had two pink machetes on it’s hands.

Bad luck 8: I wanted to sprint to Saudi embassy, and later realized that it was too early, I mean late, they embassy was already closed (they close at 3PM, it was nearing 4pm when supposedly noticed my visa expired) eh?

Bad luck 9: I reached Saudi Airlines (A.k.a Saudia) got a ticket for Friday, 27^th of October 2008, or Arabic Calendar (Hijri Calendar) 30^th of Zul-Qaida.

Bad Luck 10: I realized did not expire, but it expires on the 30^th of Zul-ul-Qaida (I know your probably thinking I pulled another magical stupidity trick, and I some how managed to read the dates wrong, but the stupid Arab stamped over another stamp.

Bad luck 11: Almost got my face bitten off by racist dog named Nommie or Nommy. (and later I thought of ways to kill her, sorry very much)

All the Bad “lucks” above took place in a span of less than six hours.

Bad luck 11: a friend’s in hospitable parents, but awesome friend

Bad Luck12: went to Saudi Embassy

Bad luck 13: Saudi Embassy dim-witted friendly bastards took over 3 hours with my passport and later told me they can’t help me

Bad luck 14: my cousin’s and her husband found a ticket to Saudi, flying on that day it self.

Bad luck 15: Reached Saudi.

Bad luck 16: my sexy 1 Terra External HD stopped wrong after few, I assume it got kicked around by my one of many nuisance siblings, it will cost me 2000RM/SR to fix it. The HD cost 390RM/SR

Bad Luck 17: My car broke down on the way to Makkah from jeddah, (about 76km road),

Bad Luck 18: My brother and I went to buy water, n the dude would not sell us water cuz we are expatriates, and yes he told us that only Saudis can buy water.

Okay, I’m getting tired of typing now, will stop here for now, hopefully be back 2morrow. Got a headache,

HAPPY EID,

Tomorrow will be a blood bath, can hardly wait

will be going back to Jeddah soon.

Another day in this beautiful land :P

yelo!

I'm at Adnan's place and typing this teehee, I have few posts coming up soon :)..so ahm yeahhh oh yeah stay tuned, thats what I wanted to say

bebsi!

Ahh what a boring day, its been 4 days since I got back, no friends to hangout with, I can’t wait to go to Jeddah, at least I know some bastards there. Hoping to go tomorrow. And chill a bit with Yasir and Sobjiwala. And I need a smoke!! Fuck its been so long since I had a cig. I miss Samporna (a brand in Malaysia).

Cultural Hypocrisy

I just got outta the mosque (yes I try to pray), and I noticed a Chinese man, well something about him didn’t seem right, particularly his moustache, his hair, and the way he dressed, and the way he spoke to his other Chinese buddies.

He had a soft moustache, wore Saudi attire known as Thobe, and spoke quite vulgar in Arabic (Makkan accent). I observed the crowed some more, I see an African and Burmese dudes with similar fashion, I wondered why? Okay it may make sense since they are in Saudi for so long, they eventually started to imitate Arabs, well in this case particularly Saudis.

Okay fine, they stayed here for so long blah blah blah, what about Malaysia? All the ethnic groups over there have their own style. Like the Indians, got their funky haircuts which if you look close its actually a road map. the Chinese got there ahm uhh uniqueness which was stolen from Japanese and Koreans, and of course the Malays (possibly Indonesians), wear super tight jeans that reveals male camel toes.

Okay I’m not saying everyone sticks to their own style, I’ve seen Chinese and Indian wearing Baju Kurongs and Kebayas, (any women can look hot in keybayas mmm..), but I’d say the ethnic groups in Malaysia got to stick to their cultural individuality and heritage. Which is definitely a good thing. Where as in Saudi, everyone tries to look the same and its boring
Anyway, my favourite cultural attires are kebayas, chongsum (ooo another hot attire mmmm), shalwar khamiz (Indian and paki), and few more that are quite hard for me to remember cuz I’m busy thinking of kebayays and chongsum.
Oh Burmese women wear kebayas too :P, its been a while since I’ve seen Burmese women with kebayas, the ones here act too Arabish,

Saris or Sharis as the Bengalis call it, are not my favourite thing, only one girl made it look hot, the rest hmm not so much.

Anywayz, I should stop rambling now, and apologize if I caused any offence to anyone’s ethnic background. I’m gonna go now and take my Thobe.